13 best dating sites for married people, according to relationship experts
No, we’re not talking about infidelity. No sneaky business here. We’re talking about the best dating sites for married people who want to explore polyamory, together or separately, with full consent and open communication.
Yep, let’s dive into the world of ethical non-monogamy (ENM, as insiders affectionately call it). This can mean polyamory, open relationships, swinging, or even exploring a threesome. There’s nothing wrong with adding an extra cook to the kitchen — as long as everyone’s on the same page, feeling respected, consenting, and having fun. Having tried a little ‘sous-chefery’ myself, I can attest that with the right boundaries, it can be an exciting and rewarding experience for both the couple and the welcomed guest.
With insight from some of the best relationship experts around, here’s our roundup of the best dating sites for married people. If that’s not you, then heading over to our list of the best dating sites for professionals, or the best dating sites for over 40s.
Where we'd head to swipe right.
Ahead, the best dating sites for married people, according to relationship experts:
Best dating site for married people overall
FEELD was one of the first dating spaces to welcome couples to explore together, transparently. With Paired Profiles and the Constellation feature (allowing up to five connected profiles), couples and married people can explore polyamory, open relationships, or simply curiosity in a consensual, stigma-free environment.
“This makes FEELD uniquely suited for those in committed relationships who want to expand intimacy on their own terms, in a supportive and understanding community,” explains Graham Riske, Marketing and Communications Lead at FEELD.
How do you use FEELD as a couple? Set up Paired or Constellation profiles to show you're exploring together. Use Group Chats to meet like-minded couples or communities. Communicate openly with your partner(s) and update your Desires regularly, as many Members evolve theirs over time.
Alice Lovegood, Sex Educator at Lustery, recommends FEELD as the best dating site for married people. “Its tagline ‘made for more’ aligns with polyamorous values, and features like the constellation tool let you tag partners while keeping individual profiles,” Lovegood shares. “For married couples, this creates transparency and encourages honest conversations without falling into the hierarchy that ‘couples profiles’ often imply.
Pros: Built-in features make it possible to date together or separately, and meet lots of like-minded people!
Cons: No algorithm can mean more swiping; the option to highlight sexual interests may steer conversations in that direction rather than ‘dating.’
Cost: Free to download and use, with premium features from £17.99 and additional in-app purchases available.
Available: iOS and Android.
Best dating site for married people runner-up
Another familiar name on the list! Unlike Bumble and Tinder (which we’ll get to later), OkCupid is actually designed to accommodate couples interested in non-monogamy or polyamory, as well as heteronormative ones. It allows you to set your relationship status as "non-monogamous" and find others who are also open to these arrangements.
They previously had a Couple Linking feature, but that’s since been removed, although you can link your partner manually in the text box. You can use the profile essay to mention your partner and explain your relationship dynamic, such as whether you date together or separately.
Then you can use the search filters to specifically find other non-monogamous profiles or people who are open to non-monogamy.
Pros: In-depth questionnaires make it great for serious dating. Inclusive and well-catered to the LGBTQIA+ community.
Cons: Many of the best features require a Premium membership. This is definitely not for casual daters or just looking for a one-off threesome.
Cost: Free membership, with paid accounts starting from £7.95.
Available: Online, iOS and Android.
Best casual dating site for married couples
3Fun promotes itself as a safe place for those looking to explore open, ethical relationships. Explore in Incognito Mode and hide your profile from your contacts, which is often a concern for ENM couples who aren’t looking to advertise the fact to everyone. You can share a couple account or link with your partner to become a couple, allowing you to adapt to your unique dating style.
We especially love the added feature of group chats, which allow you to speak to matches as a couple and arrange meetups. 3Fun supports a wide range of sexual orientations and gender identities, fostering a welcoming environment for everyone. They also utilise photo verification to ensure authenticity and reduce fake profiles.
Pros: Privacy protection with Incognito Mode. The group chat option means you can all speak together rather than always going through one half of the couple.
Cons: The user base is always growing, but currently limited compared to more mainstream apps. Some advanced features require a paid subscription, which may not be ideal for all users.
Cost: Free version to access basic features without charge. Premium membership costs approximately $29.99 (£22), with other in-app purchases for features like "Priority Messages" starting around $9.99 (£7.43).
Available: iOS and Android..png)
Best super-detailed dating site for married people
You’ve found one match, but who's to say there aren't other possible options worth exploring? Match.com is one of the UK’s biggest dating sites, boasting more than three million UK users — and unlike some dating sites which feel like a minefield of ads, notifications and clutter, Match keeps its interface clean, simple and easy to navigate.
A bit like Tinder, Match shows you one profile at a time so you can decide whether to match or skip. But unlike Tinder, it gives you a deeper insight into each person, so you’re not just judging on looks.
With detailed profiles and compatibility scores, Match aims to connect people on more than just a superficial level. You can also explore curated matches, join interest-based groups, and attend Match events in your area, making it a more social experience.
Pros: Large and diverse user base; detailed profiles for more informed connections; intuitive interface.
Cons: The demographic skews slightly older; A premium membership is needed to fully access features.
Cost: Free to join, with paid plans starting at £12.99 per month.
Available: Online, iOS and Android.
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Best dating events for married people
Describing itself as a social and dating app built for open‑minded people, WAX allows you to chat with others in a similar situation, arrange dates, or see events to further explore this community.
“WAX offers married couples a safe, sex-positive space to explore their relationship together, whether that’s opening up, polyamory, kink-friendly dating or simply broadening their social circles,” shares co-founder Emma Sayle. “The platform offers privacy protections, verified profiles and even integrated STI testing, helping couples navigate alternative relationship styles with confidence and care."
It’s worth noting that Emma is also the visionary behind Killing Kittens, a shame-free community for dating, sex ed, and so much more. Killing Kittens has been hosting events for the community for years now, and the WAX app is the next step.
Pros: This app combines socialising and dating, so you can get the best of both worlds. The in-person meetups are a great way to ease into the community. They really consider your online and offline safety, and vet events carefully.
Cons: Predominantly in London right now, with a few events across the world.
Cost: Free version for basic features, or X PLUS package for £24.99 per month, £44.99 per quarter, or £119.99 per annum.
Available: Online, iOS and Android.
Best dating site for married people for virtual events
Ready to bring the joy back into your dating life? JOYclub aims to meet you at whatever point you’re at on your sexual journey. Find people to date in your local area, log in for livestream sessions, attend nearby erotic events and club nights, read and ask questions on the forum, and more.
“I think what's so unique about a club like JOYclub and similar spaces is that they offer this really unique, really accepted, non heteronormative, non-expectation-focused area for this kind of exploration,” shares ambassador Gigi Engle. “So there's no expectation that you have to play if you don't want to.”
Pros: If you live in a more remote area, you can still connect through the online aspects and [saucy] livestreams. Verification is required, so that weeds out any fakes.
Cons: The forums can be a little intense if you’re new to the community, and some users find it harder to actually find dates through the site, in particular.
Cost: For a limited time, UK members can enjoy premium features at no additional cost simply by verifying their account.
Available: Online, iOS and Android.
Best dating site for married couples for solo dating
Right off the bat, it is necessary to clarify that Bumble isn’t designed for polyamorous dating. However, many do utilise Bumble in this way, especially if both partners are looking to solo date.
The key to using Bumble as a married person is clarity. In your profile, you should clearly state that you’re ethically non-monogamous, and whether you and your partner are looking to date separately or together. Keep in mind that a lot of people are using Bumble for monogamous dating, but you never know who you might encounter.
Tip: If you and your partner are looking to date together, ensure that you’re both in the photos! Too often, I’ve encountered heterosexual couples that don’t show the male partner and say that you should message for a photo of them. Let’s be upfront and transparent, people!
Pros: Larger dating pool, lots of prompts, great for dating, not just physical intimacy.
Cons: Not specialised for polyamory or open relationships, so it might take you a while to find the right fit.
Cost: Free to download and use, with premium additions available.
Available: Online, iOS and Android.
Best mainstream dating site for married people
Once again, we need to communicate that this app is not designed for polyamory specifically; however, new features added to Tinder make the transition towards these kinds of dating far easier.
First off: Tinder works similarly to other swipe-based dating apps, where you scroll through profiles and select any you like the look of. It’s designed with monogamous relationships in mind, although many piggybacked it with ENM or looking for thirds content.
But now, you can use it similarly to how you use Feeld, thanks to their new Double Date feature. Designed for two friends to link their profiles and go on a double date with two other friends, you could use this with your significant other. Simply, each make a profile and link them, and then go on dates with other couples or single sets of friends. Make sure to clarify that this is the case in your profiles, of course. And to reiterate: this wasn’t the purpose of the feature initially, but many ENM couples are finding it useful.
Pros: Super easy to use; huge dating pool; constantly adding new features.
Cons: Profiles can feel less detailed, and it tends to have a reputation for casual hookups.
Cost: Free, with Tinder Plus options starting at just 79p.
Available: Online, iOS and Android.
Best educational dating site for married people
Now this is one of those apps that normies might not have heard of, but is a big name within the ENM community. #Open is a dating app designed for individuals and couples exploring ethical non-monogamy (ENM), including polyamory, open relationships, and swinging lifestyles. It provides a platform for users to connect with like-minded individuals in a respectful and inclusive environment.
You can state your relationship style (poly, open, swinger, ENM, etc.) and what you’re looking for (friends, hookups, threesomes, long-term connections). Instead of swiping endlessly, #Open uses hashtags to match you. You add tags to your profile, and the app matches you with people who share the same tags. Once you see someone (or a couple) you like, you can send a message or like their profile.
It allows couples to create joint profiles, facilitating shared experiences and interactions. #Open also provides access to a blog with articles on non-monogamy, relationship dynamics, and personal stories, which can be helpful wherever you are on your journey.
Pros: Offers options to control visibility and manage who can see your profile. Caters to a diverse range of 20+ sexual orientations and 20+ gender identities.
Cons: As a niche app, the user base may be smaller compared to mainstream dating platforms. Some users have reported challenges with app functionality and customer support.
Cost: A free version is available to access basic features, with additional features offered for a fee.
Available: iOS and Android.
Best non-swiping dating site for married people
MoreThanOne is a dating app specifically built for ethical non-monogamous (ENM) / polyamorous dating. It welcomes singles, couples, and people exploring non-traditional relationship dynamics. It is not a swiping app. Instead, it uses detailed profiles so you can describe who you are, what your relationship style is, and what you're looking for — goodbye finger cramps!
There’s also a private profile option, giving extra discretion for people who want more control over visibility. The real benefit to dedicated apps like MoreThanOne is that you're among people who already share ENM or polyamorous inclinations, so a lot less explaining or guesswork. FYI, its motto is that you don’t have to be single to date.
Pros: Detailed profiles let people be more intentional — you get to see more about someone’s relationship style, boundaries, preferences, etc. We especially love the ability to add profile videos.
Cons: Smaller user base compared to mainstream apps; you may see fewer potential matches depending on your location. Some reports of bugs, glitches, or issues with app stability.
Cost: Basic features are free. There is a subscription option (in-app purchase) for more visibility or additional features. For instance, the monthly subscription costs about £9.99 in some markets.
Available: iOS and Android.
Best queer dating site for married people
Plura (formerly Bloom Community) is a social, dating, and events app that centres people from queer, sex-positive, polyamorous, wellness, alternative, and growth-oriented communities. It’s less about endless swiping and more about genuine connections through shared experiences, common values, and authentic interactions.
Plura hosts curated events (in-person and virtual), run by partner organisers. Think parties, workshops, ‘munches’ (informal meetups), happy hours, picnics, etc. You can RSVP to events, see who’s attending, chat with other attendees before the event, and (if there’s mutual interest) connect more afterwards.
Instead of just swiping, you “Bud” someone (which is like a mutual opt-in/friend-like connection). If they “Bud” you back, you can start a 1-on-1 chat. No fear of unsolicited DMs here. In your profile, you can indicate what kind of connection you’re open to (friends, dates, partners, etc.), filter by what feels right for you, and choose preferences, etc.
Pros: Real-life, value-aligned connections via events = you meet people in person (or in immersive virtual spaces) rather than just through apps. Designed for people who want deeper, authentic interactions, not just swiping and photo judgements.
Cons: Events can be expensive or difficult to attend in some cities, and availability can be inconsistent depending on the location.
Cost: Free to join and use basic features (RSVP events, Bud people, chat with mutual Buds). Plura+ subscription for premium: discounts on in-person/virtual events, ability to see who likes you, etc. Pricing (per Apple Store) is approximately $24.99 (£19)/month.
Available: iOS and Android.
Best dating site for bisexual married people
Not to be confused with OkCupid, as this is a different site named after the winged cherub of love. BiCupid is specifically designed for bisexual singles and couples, plus bi-curious folks. That means you’re more likely to meet people who “get it” and share your orientation or relationship style.
Includes couples profiles & “unicorn”/threesome match options—though on that note, many in the community don’t love the “unicorn” label for such things. If you’re in an open relationship or exploring non-monogamy, the platform supports those dynamics.
Good profile detail and customisation. Users can set preferences clearly, browse via advanced filters, use video chat, and there are verification features to reduce fake profiles.
Pros: Over 10 privacy settings, ability to hide certain information or make certain elements of your profile visible only to people you allow. Also, we love to see a bisexual-focused dating site!
Cons: Decently sized user base, although it’s less helpful outside of big cities. The design and interface on desktop is considered a bit outdated compared to more modern apps.
Cost: Free to join, create a profile, browse, and use basic features. One month is $29.95 (£22), with deals for 3-month or 6-month plans.
Available: Online, iOS and Android.
Best platonic dating site for married people
Now this app can be used platonically or romantically, depending on what you’re looking for. Lex is a queer-centric social / dating app where text and community matter more than visuals. You can post what you’re looking for (friends, dates, hookups, queer community) and respond to others’ posts instead of swiping. It’s extremely inclusive, designed for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, non-binary, and queer people, etc.
“Lex was built around authentic connection and community rather than swipe culture, making it a natural fit for married couples interested in ethical non-monogamy,” shares co-founder Michelle Parsons. “It’s a space where openness and curiosity are celebrated, and where people can explore relationship styles that align with their values.”
Pros: Rather than relying heavily on photos (and superficial things), you connect through short descriptions/blurb rather than relying heavily on photos.
Cons: Because it de-emphasises visuals, for some people it may feel slower or less immediately engaging than swipe apps. It has pivoted more toward a “social platform” rather than pure dating.
Cost: Limited features unless you pay or use posts carefully (e.g. restrictions on the number of posts per month).
Available: iOS and Android.
How to choose the right dating site for polyamory:
You’re looking to widen the scope of your intimacy, so what do you need to keep in mind? Here are expert-backed tips for using dating sites as a married couple.
Don’t limit yourself to your dating preferences/interests, as you and your partner are so much more than that. If you’re looking to truly date other people, then give them more to get to know you. Riske suggests you “add Interests beyond dating (books, art, travel) so connections are rooted in shared values and lifestyles.”
Once your profile is out, there is a chance someone you know will see it; that’s simply the truth of the matter. While there is NOTHING to be ashamed of, you need to be comfortable with this possibility. This is why many prefer dedicated dating sites for married people, like FEELD, over regular apps. Alternatively, you may prefer to cover your faces and/or use pseudonyms at first. But it should go without saying that there is no excuse for catfishing or deceiving people.
“Prioritise platforms that emphasise identity verification, privacy and health tools, so you can explore safely and confidently,” Sayle urges.
Before embarking on this wild adventure, take a moment to connect with yourself. “Take the time to explore who you are, what you value, and what truly makes you happy,” recommends Riske. Don’t risk being crowded by other partners before you know what you’re bringing to the table.
Not everyone is open to dating or even sleeping with someone who is ENM, and that is their decision to make. You should never hide your relationship status, as they may have incorrect expectations of what could come from this. Always be upfront and honest, as consent requires full knowledge.
A guide to swiping for seniors.
Lovegood is experienced in the world of polyamory and urges individuals to not only think of themselves as a unit: “My biggest piece of advice? Honour your individuality within your marriage — it not only attracts authentic matches but also reflects the respect polyamory is built on.”
There are a lot of tips for polyamory in general, but especially when you and/or your partner are using dating apps, it’s important to stay upfront and honest with one another. Decide whether you can only message together or feel comfortable using it solo, and what you’d each like to know.
“My advice for couples using apps is to be upfront and aligned with each other on intentions,” advises Parsons. “Clear communication and shared boundaries are what make exploring new dynamics fulfilling and sustainable.”
Sayle urges users to avoid meeting up too quickly. “Start slowly and use messaging/group chats first before jumping into in-person meetups,” she advises. When you do get to the first meetup, Sayle suggests choosing community events or workshops to meet like-minded people rather than blind dates.
Meet the experts:
| Graham Riske | Marketing and Communications Lead at FEELD. |
| Alice Lovegood | Sex Educator at Lustery. |
| Emma Sayle | Co-founder of WAX. |
| Gigi Engle | Educator at sex positive community JOYclub. |
| Michelle Parsons | Co-founder & CPO at Lex. |
