When GIRLS first aired in 2012, I’d just moved to London in a fragile state. I was 22. I was feeling all sorts of insecurities at the time, including but not limited to: the emotional and financial hangover of hating university, a newish break-up, friendship group problems, body image insecurities and no real career plan. I wasn’t a big TV binger, I’d just skip through the channels while cooking my budget dinners, but one evening I caught a glimpse of her in the first episode of GIRLS where Adam nearly puts it in the “wrong hole” doggy-style. Her being Lena Dunham. I was instantly obsessed. Who was this girl? Finally, a woman who unapologetically showed a pale body shape similar to mine; acted in raw uncomfortable sex scenes that I could (unfortunately) relate all too well to and the show was riddled with Millennial zeigesty “in jokes” about what happened to be trending on Twitter. Its intelligent dialogue knocked stuffy not-so-down-with-the-kids sitcoms out of the park.
Five years ago, there was nothing like it on TV. The best TV critics could do when it first aired was frantically compare it to Sex and The City because look! Four white women living in New York! But it was a world away from Carrie’s Manolo Blahniks.
GIRLS presented (and gave us permission to accept) unlikeable, flawed individuals who messed up daily. And by doing so it made us all feel more normal and less embarrassed about our unfiltered lives and constantly living off our overdraft. It made me feel less alone. Less awkward about the harsh realities that happened outside of Instagram. It made me feel desperate for everyone to feel this way, to feel represented on screen, like I felt. Amongst all the generic traditionally-beautiful Hollywood castings, it’s imperative that this happens across the board.
I became hooked on the youth and talent of Lena and her multi-hyphenate role in the world of TV and media. An ambitious fire started burning in my belly. Watching Lena do big things in her twenties — a young woman in charge of a TV set, and sitting in the director’s chair — made me excited. She became someone I could hang on to, look up to and tweet late at night. Hannah Horvath became an on-screen pal but Lena, also a plugged-in twenty-something at the time, also became a real friend online. One evening back in 2013, I wrote a blog post called “The Girls Finale” (season 2) and I tweeted it to Lena. You don’t expect famous TV stars to notice you. But Lena never acted like a famous TV star. She favourited my tweet and followed me back. We DM’d each other and she saved me tickets to a sold-out London event she was doing, and we hung out in a hotel. My on-screen hero had become my IRL friend, and it all felt very GIRLS-esque.
I’m of course sad GIRLS is ending, but it feels right that it is. Lena and her cast members have entered a new decade of their lives, as have the majority of viewers who adore the show. GIRLS armed me with witty one-liners, on-screen friends and an escape from the daily pressures of perfection. It gave me the confidence to pursue my dream career. The last five years of GIRLS marks huge change and turning points in my adult life and it’s sad to say goodbye - but through a beautiful twist of Internet fate, I get to keep a friend in Lena for life.
Listen to Emma Gannon in conversation with Lena Dunham on her podcast Ctrl Alt Delete available on iTunes or ACAST.
