The manosphere is no longer a secret. In fact, a study released today (14 November) shows that 50% of men endorse red pill rhetoric, which is defined as “gender regressive and misogynistic ideology”.
The study, from Equimundo: Center for Masculinities and Social Justice and Beyond Equality, explores the emotional, economic, and cultural pressures facing men in the UK. While it reveals cause for hope – one particularly encouraging statistic indicates that 91% of men believe being a friend is a key quality of manhood – it also raises the alarm about red pill ideology.
One disturbing statistic indicates that 50% of men endorse extreme red-pill ideology. The term ‘red-pill’ originates from a Reddit community, known as r/TheRedPill, which is itself derived from a scene in the 1999 film The Matrix, in which Keanu Reeves must choose from the blue pill or the red pill, the latter of which will open his eyes to a life-changing reality. For those in the manosphere, the red pill refers to a ‘reality’ in which men are the ones being oppressed by women, not the other way around.
The new research found that men who endorsed gender regressive ideas associated with red pill rhetoric were found to be six times more likely to express anti-democratic views, as well as the following worrying statistics:
- 63% of men believe ‘no one cares whether men are ok these days.’
- 68% of men believe they can have their reputation destroyed ‘just for speaking their minds.’
- Over 50% of men believe that feminism is about favouring women over men
- 68% of men believe that men should be more respected in society
“We want to make sure no one else’s life is lost at the hands of this toxic site.”
In an age of “influencers” like Andrew Tate and world leaders like President Donald Trump — and it can all feel rather bleak — in fact, it's easy to imagine that the manosphere will continue to grow, claiming the minds of more and more boys and men with no hope of recovery. Here in the UK, the government is only just beginning to take the threat of the manosphere seriously — apparently, it took a hyped Netflix show – thank you, Adolescence – to spur them into action. But so far, it hasn't been nearly enough.
However, there is perhaps one glimmer of hope. Some men who have fallen into these online misogynistic communities have started attempting to break free from the manosphere. There are growing communities where previously 'red-pilled' men come together to unlearn the misogyny that has been spoon-fed to them online.
“At Refuge, almost all the survivors we support have experienced some form of tech-facilitated abuse.”
Joshua Thorburn is a researcher completing his PhD in Criminology at Monash University. He studies online communities to try and “develop a more nuanced and thorough understanding of misogynistic incels (incels.is) and the broader manosphere (e.g. r/TheRedPill)."
Overall, his research has found that there are benefits to these counter-manosphere movements online.
“My research found that some people who had believed in manosphere ideas found r/ExRedPill and r/IncelExit [Reddit communities countering the manosphere] to be helpful spaces for many reasons,” he tells us. “Some used the forums to query certain manosphere ideas and gauge outside opinions. Because many people drawn to the manosphere seem to have difficulties with body image and self-esteem, others sought social and emotional support as they discussed these issues outside the manosphere.”
These spaces also offered men an alternative narrative to the Red Pill ideology that women are only attracted to men who are, for instance, “Over six feet tall, muscular, rich, dominant and emotionally stoic.”
“In r/ExRedPill and r/IncelExit, while such issues with self-esteem and body image are still often discussed, other users respond empathetically and offer more realistic and nuanced advice,” he says.
Gus*, who is from the northeast of the U.S. and in his early 20s, is a member of the r/ExRedPill community on Reddit.
“I’ve come to realise (and to some extent, I knew all along) that the ideology simply isn’t true,” he says anonymously of his reasons for seeking alternative ways of thinking. “You don’t really need this or that to find love or follow some script of what it means to be some ‘giga sigma ligma’ alpha male or whatever the f*** just so people like you.”
He began to question the misogynistic content he had been fed online because of what he saw in the real world.
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“I’ve seen and met guys who have wonderful friendships or even loving marriages, even though their bodies don’t look chiselled out of marble or aren’t mega wealthy,” he says. “I realised that this ideology serves as fuel for my self-hatred and puts me on this never-ending ladder to finally reach a point where I’m ‘man’ enough to deserve a good life. I know I can’t live like this forever and expect it to go down well.”
Ted* is another member of the community who began to question what he'd been taught. “The red pill provides some comfort by giving you more control over yourself, by telling you what to improve to be attractive for example,” he says. “[I realised] you don't need to be a millionaire to get a girlfriend either. She isn't some perfect princess waiting for her sigma, she has her flaws, like every human. You don't need to be perfect to get a girlfriend.”
Thorburn is hopeful that these kinds of communities will offer a safe, judgment-free space for men seeking to leave the Red Pill community.
“Many of the users who provide advice on these forums are actually people who have formerly believed in manosphere ideas themselves,” he says. “Because such individuals are more likely to have more similar life experiences, and can understand from personal experience what being part of the manosphere is like, their participation in these forums is really promising.”
“We’re all here to play. We’re in the prime of our football careers.”
Of course, it's rarely as straightforward as joining a new Reddit community — un learning the Red Pill teachings can be a long, thorny process.
“It is also important to recognise that leaving behind these ideologies is not a simple step-by-step process,” Thorburn says. “Many users who appear to be sincerely trying to leave the manosphere, often seem to post multiple times in these forums, and sometimes struggle to leave behind such ideas. Furthermore, even if I observed that some former members of the manosphere eventually developed very progressive and egalitarian views, many may still retain some prejudicial beliefs, even if they have disavowed other misogynistic ideas.”
Tommy*, a 45-year-old from the US, is one member of the community who, when I speak to him, still shows examples of misogynistic thinking. “I've come to believe certain things about women, but I accept that's merely how women are wired,” he says. “Morally, it's neither good nor bad. It just is.”
Gus also still doesn't know how he'll ever fully change his ways of thinking. “[With Red Pill] the world feels simpler and provides some sense of control," he says. "I joined this community and try to deprogram myself with videos with critiques of the Red Pill, so I guess that’s a start. I also try to be more cognisant of the world around me whenever I’m actually outside.”
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Thornburn concedes that these communities have their limitations.
“Even if they receive empathetic support and advice from other users on the forum, this is simply not enough support for a lot of users,” he says. “Some posts really show that some individuals are facing severe struggles with things like depression, anxiety and with body image. Occasionally, some people posting on the forums will mention that they feel suicidal. While it is good that individuals are reaching out to try and find support, sometimes more beneficial help might be found through seeing a qualified therapist, or reaching out to a mental health support hotline.”
Gus is one ex-Red Piller who has benefited from extra support. “Frankly, I also go a little heavy duty and have full-on therapy, but that’s because I have a lot of baggage,” he says. “I don’t know if I recommend it 100% due to cost and the time to find a good match, but it’s worth considering.”
Thorburn notes that it may not actually be all that helpful to peek inside the world of these counter movements online. "Generally, I think it’s better if people who are outsiders to the manosphere, don’t just go on the r/ExRedPill forum to criticise the manosphere.
"Research on deradicalisation generally shows that it’s easier for someone to leave an extremist group, if they feel supported in that process. So I fear that if someone who is potentially thinking about leaving the manosphere, and they start going on r/IncelExit or r/ExRedPill and they feel that place is really hostile towards them, it may actually dissuade them from seeking help… Because if someone’s doing that in a really hostile way, that’s probably going to be counterproductive."
So, what's next? “Although HealthyGamerGG, r/IncelExit and r/ExRedPill can't always help everybody, it's great that there are accessible and free resources out there that can support people who are struggling with things like loneliness, anxiety and low self-esteem,” says Thorburn. “Potentially, helpful resources like this could help incels to deradicalise, or to even divert vulnerable individuals from going into the manosphere to begin with.”
In other words, the appearance of these communities is a positive sign, and it is important for men who have been radicalised to have a safe, non-judgmental place to go through the process of deradicalisation. Is it the only solution? No. While grassroots movements are vital, we also need to continue pushing for awareness, education and government-led policies that keep women safe and help men find the support they need.
As Dan Guinness, the Managing Director of Beyond Equality, says, “Across the UK, important progress is being made to engage men and boys in developing deeper, more connected understandings of themselves and their roles in society.
For this progress to be sustained and effective, it must rest on shared principles that recognise the diversity of masculinities, the realities of precarity and power, and the fundamental importance of purpose, care, and connection.”
He believes there is a conspiracy against men, that our societies are not patriarchal and never were (because the very concept of patriarchy is a fabrication), and that women should not be allowed to have an abortion without a man's consent.
*Name has been changed for anonymity.
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