The thing about going on maternity leave, aside from it being nothing like what you imagined for 99.9% of the time (no one warned me that they fight naps and make your life a misery until they’re big enough to bribe with snacks) is that you are broke. Absolutely broke. And for the first time in my adult life, I was asking my husband to transfer money to my bank account.
Yep, we’ve been married for five years, we own a property together, have a child and don’t have a joint bank account. Of course, we had all those conversations before we got married - the ones about having kids, where we want to live when we move out of London and the places we’re desperate to visit but merging finances? It just never really happened.
Recent research by F&C Investment Trust revealed that we are not alone. A poll of 2,000 adults in the UK found that 51% of those in a relationship did not have a joint bank account with a third preferring to keep their finances separate.
For me, it wasn’t necessarily that we purposely chose not to open one - we just haven’t felt the need. We share an address, a love of crime dramas and Labradors- but that’s where it stops. I don’t know how much he has in his bank account (and vice-versa), and I never have. We’ve been dating since we were at university and I’ve always kept my finances relatively private. I like the independence and the fact no one can snoop in and tell me what I should and shouldn’t be spending my money on. Maybe there was some embarrassment involved too. I’d lived at home until my mid twenties and foolishly never saved as much as I could have done. It took a frank conversation with him to realise I needed to take things more seriously if I was to ever get out.
When we did manage to get on the property ladder, we worked out exactly what each person could contribute and I simply transfer the amount to him after payday. We've never really shared our money. We take it in turns to buy household essentials and groceries and send each other the odd “you owe me” for flights or bills. OK, not everyone’s idea of marital bliss but for us it works just fine.
There’s also a lot to be said for keeping a gulf between our finances. It's nobody’s problem but my own if I rack up a huge bill for going to that sample sale I couldn’t really afford, and given that M seems to have invested his income in various shares and funds, I’d hate to know things were going badly.
Dylan Jones from the Income and Expenditure Hub (IE Hub) told GLAMOUR: “From our recent Affordability Trends research, we know that women like to take control of their finances and are the first to put their hands up for help if they are slipping into debt and need help and advice.
“This is probably one of the key reasons why joint account ownership could be falling out of favour - we know that more women than men want greater control and personal accountability towards spending and saving money and are happy and confident to go it alone.”
Sometimes it can be tricky to tell until you hit a crisis, so it – quite literally – pays to read this.
It wasn’t until I went on maternity leave in 2021, however, that my feelings towards having a joint bank account changed. Suddenly I had no income of my own (I’m freelance, I got a minimal statutory pay) and once my savings were eaten up, I felt like a child asking for pocket money. While there was never any issue from him and he always wanted me to have what I needed, this felt like a new low. Perhaps if we’d had a joint bank account things wouldn’t have felt so divided.
I’d be lying if I said that our choice didn’t leave me worrying about things. I know that if anything happened to him, I’d struggle to pay the bills without his account access. In the UK, it’s illegal to withdraw money from any bank account that belongs to somebody who has died, even if I’m the power of attorney and his wife, I’d still have to apply for a grant of probate which could take months. Whereas, I’d not have that issue if we had a joint account.
On the other hand, I know for many other women, there’s tremendous risk involved by merging their money with a spouse. One in six women in the UK has experienced financial abuse by a current or former partner, according to charity Surviving Economic Abuse (SEA). This can include restricting access to money which would be particularly problematic for those who have only a joint bank account to their name. Merging accounts also risks women losing the right to protect what’s theirs, especially if things turn sour.
Finance manager at Yonder, Priscilla Low, warned GLAMOUR that there’s also other things at stake: “There’s a growing problem for women who allow their partners to manage their finances, disempowering them to learn about personal finance and make decisions in their best interest. Many women who become divorced in their late 30s and 40s have no credit history because they’ve never had a financial service or bill registered in their name.”
She urges women to “build your credit history when you are young.” Adding: “This means having bills registered in your name, using things like credit cards responsibly, and making sure you are building a history of making payments for things like phone plans, Klarna payments and gym memberships on time.
Let's talk money.
Of course, there’s been a cultural and generational shift too. Our parents can’t understand that we don't have a joint bank account. It’s what they did when they got married - and it’s what their parents did too and it’s understandable. It wasn’t until 1975 and the introduction of the Sex Discrimination Act that a British woman could open a bank account in her own name so yes, merging finances with a spouse made sense at one point, but does it really today?
Banking these days, after all, is efficient. I can transfer money to his account with just my finger print. There’s no queuing up in a bank or paying cheques in. Part of the problem with opening a joint account is that it requires more admin; phone calls, six months of bank statements (how do I get those?) and, well, to be honest, we just can’t really be bothered. I suspect, one day, we'll end up getting one for the sake of the financial security but until then, I’ll keep tabs on my account and he, his.
Philip Stubbins, Managing Director of online comparison website Money Expert, outlines the advantages and disadvantages of a joint bank account.
The Advantages of a Joint Account for Couples
Joint bills and outgoings - If you’re a couple and you live together, the chances are you’ll jointly be responsible for any monthly bills and outgoings. Having a joint bank account makes paying bills much easier, helping you both manage your bills effectively and conveniently as all outgoings are coming out of one account. A joint account also helps avoid disputes such as who pays for what and so long as you both pay enough in on a regular basis, you can be certain that the money you need is there when you need it.
More transparency with spending - A joint account allows couples to keep track of their spending together, making them both accountable for any outgoings. As a couple, being more accountable for your own spending could help encourage you to save more and even build a more trusting relationship with your partner when it comes to your finances.
Greater protection - Every individual in the UK has Financial Services Compensation Scheme (FSCS) protection up to £85,000 across each bank they hold an account with, which will compensate them in the event of the bank or building society going under. Couples who sign up to a joint account therefore can get up to £170,000 protection from the FSCS, provided they don’t have a separate account with the same bank, giving them greater assurance that their money is safe and secure.
Easy access in the event of death - If the unthinkable happens and someone in a couple dies, the other account holder will have instant access to the funds available in the joint account, even if they aren’t married. This prevents the requirement for a Grant of Probate to access any money within the account (usually needed to obtain funds in a standalone bank account if a partner dies).
Save together - A joint account is a great way for couples to save for a shared financial goal, such as buying a house or a holiday. It also makes saving a lot easier as you can both view your money in one place, helping you to build a better financial relationship with money which could even help you reach your target amount even quicker.
Disadvantages of a Joint Account for Couples
Bad credit rating - If one half of a couple has a poor credit rating, it could have a negative effect on the other person's score, which could lead to issues with getting financial products such as loans and credit cards in the future. To avoid this, make sure you have a conversation with your partner before you commit to opening a joint bank account together to ensure that this is the right decision for you and won’t affect your financial situation in the long run.
Do you trust each other with money? - You need to be able to trust each other if you’re going to collectively pool your finances together in one account. If either one of the couple has a history of poor financial management, loves to spend or is often using their arranged overdraft, consider whether a joint account is really the best option for you both. Remember, it’s important to understand each other's spending habits before committing to a joint bank account together.
Responsible for overdraft charges together - Those who are named on a joint bank account have equal access and are also equally responsible for any overdraft fees that are incurred. Therefore, if either account holder overspends and enters into the overdraft, it is both parties responsibility to pay the money back.
What if we break up? - In the event of a break up, it’s essential that you both collectively come to an agreement regarding your finances to ensure that you agree how any remaining funds in the joint account are divided up. If a split isn’t amicable and an ex-partner racks up debts using the funds and overdraft in the account, the other named account holder will still be liable for any monies owed to the bank. There is no legal protection in place to fall back on if your partner does take any of the funds either. You should always speak to your bank as soon as possible to let them know you’re splitting up, as they will be able to offer solutions such as separate accounts or a temporary freeze.
Do you have different relationships with money? - It’s worth having a conversation with your partner before you commit to a joint bank account, as your spending habits could cause issues with both your finances and your relationship later on down the line. Make sure you have similar financial goals and communicate well with each other when it comes to money. If your financial goals align then a joint bank account could be a good option. If they don’t, separate accounts are likely to make more sense.
