There’s nothing quite like sitting in front of a mirror for three hours wearing an ill-fitting polyester cape and thumbing through a six-month-old copy of a glossy mag to humble you.
Hopefully, however, you get to walk away from the experience with a spring in your step as you strut out the salon with a new found confidence that propels you to take an unabashed public selfie, foundation-free forehead and all.
Sometimes though, that doesn’t happen, and you get that sinking feeling in your stomach as your hairdresser reaches down to slide that black two handled mirror out. “I love it,” you hear yourself say, as you squint back at your reflection and wonder if they too heard your voice tremor.
I know I’ve been there. The memory of one particular full head of highlights has stayed with me forever. I got home and sat in front of the mirror, Joaquin Phoenix in The Joker style. Digging through my makeup bag in a desperate attempt to see if eyeliner or a red lip could salvage the golden springer spaniel streaks running through my hair.
Spoiler alert: They didn’t.
While my regrettable colour choice was eventually reversed with some brunette box dye, my friend Josie’s bob not only became a family parable but continues to haunt her to this day.
“My sister Abbi told me I would look good with a bob, so I walked down to the salon without putting two minutes of thought into it.”
We can see where this is going, can’t we?
“I came home, and my mum looked at me like, ‘what have you done?’. I hated it and I still live with the consequences to this day as my hair doesn’t grow”.
It’s a tale as old as time and while we might not all have an Abbi encouraging us to go for the chop, I’m sure we’ve all been persuaded at one time or other into a regrettable hair choice by an over enthusiastic stylist with a fresh NVQ certification.
Thankfully, for me, I met my now hairdresser Adam Reed. Our first introduction was when I took part in ghd’s ‘Chop To Your Chin’ campaign and donated over 12 inches of hair to the Little Princess Trust.
Despite straightening my hair beforehand to ensure I was chopping nothing but the minimal entry requirement, Adam convinced me to go quite literally chin length in a move that could have seen me never talk to him again.
But there were no tears and instead Adam unlocked a part of me that had been hiding behind my hair for too long.
I wish you could all have an Adam aka a hairdresser you implicitly trust, but it’s hard enough to get an appointment with him as it is. So instead, I asked him how we can avoid walking out of the salon like a deflated balloon to begin with.
“Follow these 3 rules: Always come prepared with a picture, always be realistic and always listen to your hairdresser,” he tells me. Before adding, “If you get a bit of a bad vibe from your stylist then don’t be afraid to go somewhere else, I do truly believe that.”
So, yes, never be embarrassed to share that screenshot of Zendaya, but do be prepared for a hairstylist to manage these expectations with you.
Here is exactly what you need to ask your hairdresser…
“A good hairdresser will create what works for you and your hair,” says Adam. “Taking a picture of someone with a wig or a full set of extensions or someone that has the time and resource for a professional blow-dry every day when you don’t, can mean unrealistic expectations.”
Another point Adam makes is something I have learnt myself over the years, “Consider what you’re happy to commit to, once you’ve left the salon. Any hairdresser worth their salt will advise you on the best route for you and your hair”.
As someone that is inherently lazy and hasn’t picked up a curling tong since 2019, I always go for a slightly shaggier cut that works when my hair is left to air dry.
Same with my colour. I spent years trying to be blonde before giving up and going back to brunette. Now I stick somewhere around the middle and just tone it up or down depending on the season.
With Adam’s tips, you should no longer dread the “do you want to see it from the back?” conversation. But if you do, it’s always better to be honest with your stylist either in person or over the phone once you’ve left the salon, if confrontation is your Vecna.
One friend I have is particularly good at this as it’s sadly a common reality for her, as she has “difficult hair to work with” Her words, not mine.
“I’ve had my fair share of appointments that haven’t gone to plan,” she tells me. “As a makeup artist myself I can’t think of anything worse than someone going home and washing their face rather than telling me they didn’t like their makeup and giving me the chance to change it. So, I always take the same approach with my hair”.
Rather than showing a reference picture of someone else, her approach is to show the hairdresser a picture of a time she’s liked her own hair which can also help soothe the blow if it’s a cut or colour they previously created.
Remember, a good hairdresser will always offer to fix anything you’re not happy with whether it’s there and then or if they have to book you another appointment. If you’ve stuck by Adam’s rules and you’re not happy but your hairdresser isn’t willing to work with you, this is a them, not you situation and it’s time to find someone else.
I look forward to seeing you at the basin.
