It has come to my attention that having Thursday weddings is now deemed inconsiderate, selfish and rude. But when I had my 2019 wedding on a Thursday in September, it was the best and most financially sound decision we could’ve made about the whole event — and most of our guests had the time of their lives.
Every couple with impending nuptials start with some idea of how much their big day might cost. But, unless money is no object, these imagined numbers are smashed by the hammer of reality, and couples often have to choose between paying thousands for a midweek wedding and shelling out hundreds to thousands of pounds more for a weekend one.
My husband and I had our wedding at Trinity Buoy Wharf, home to London’s only lighthouse with an incredible view of the Thames and The O2 opposite. When it came time to choose a date, we looked at the £3,900 (before VAT) cost of dry hiring the venue on weekdays and compared it to the £6,500 cost of hiring it on a Saturday at peak time. It would have cost £5,500 to have it on the Friday and £4,400 on Sunday. These were 2019 prices; it would now cost an additional £2,450 to have a Saturday wedding. Yes, all before VAT.
The choice was easy. A Thursday wedding allowed us to stretch whatever was left in the budget further, so we could afford delicious food, a brilliant florist and a fantastic photographer. It also turned out to be the last sunny, warm day of that summer, so our wedding album is full of photos of us squinting and smiling in the sun, and me wearing sunglasses with my wedding dress, which is very Charli XCX of me, if I do say so myself. I don’t regret it at all — but I do understand why choosing a midweek wedding date can be controversial among guests.
The reason things worked out well for our guests and us was because we were able to send our Save The Dates in May 2018, a year and four months before our wedding date. Giving guests plenty of advance notice gave them time to book time off work and make travel and babysitting arrangements.
We had friends and family flying in from all over the world, from Malaysia, where I am from, and the US. Knowing the date so far in advance meant they could save up or use a credit card and have most of it paid off by the time they arrived. Guests in the UK were pleased to have Thursday and Friday off work, because it meant having Friday to recover and the entire weekend ahead of them to enjoy.
My advice to couples considering Thursday weddings is to make the decision as early as possible so that your guests have the best chance of being there for your big day — and you can save big bucks in the process.
It's never been so expensive to be a wedding guest, but for some, it's less than the social cost of being upfront about money.
