It's the most wonderful – and, arguably, wholesome – time of the year. The festive season, and the Christmas films that come with it, oftentimes feature cosiness, sparkling decorations, the serving of copious amounts of food and mulled wine, a touch of schmaltzy romance. It also offers a chance to reflect on the year, or to disappear into a Santa-sponsored form of escapism from the demands of modern life if we so choose.
So all these Christmassy traditions aside, why have the 2024 offerings of new Christmas films been so, well, horny? First Netflix dropped The Merry Gentlemen, starring Noughties teen pin-up Chad Michael Murray and Britt Robertson, which transports us to the world of a struggling small-town music venue that needs to be saved (so far, so festive Christmas story), by way of an “all-male, Christmas-themed revue”. Cue the topless men (including Chad) donning fireman hats and high-vis jackets and making a girating performance to save the venue. Very Magic Mike vibes, by way of Christmas cheer.
Next up, we have Hot Frosty, a story of lonely widow Kathy (played by Mean Girls' Gretchen, Lacey Chabert) who finds comfort in a handsome (again, initially topless) male stranger, who turns out to be a snowman brought to life. Just like in The Merry Gentlemen, there's suggestion of a romantic storyline between the two leads, as Jack (credited as Jack Snowman on IMDB and played by Schitt's Creek star Dustin Milligan) helps Kathy to find love and connection again after the loss of her husband. Again, so far so festive Christmas story. But Hot Frosty is distinctively, and confrontingly, horny – particularly when we see Milligan's Snowman run around town with his rippling abs and guns on show. It's comical, but also undeniably sexy.
Hot Frosty was also (perhaps not surprisingly) particularly popular with audiences, sitting for a week at the number one movie position on Netflix, suggesting that we are in fact horny for these kind of stories.
We also have Lindsay Lohan's latest Christmas movie offering, Our Little Secret, which sees her character Avery find herself under the same roof as her ex boyfriend Logan for the festive season, after belatedly discovering that their current partners are siblings. We must admit, there's considerably less nudity in this one, but it does show undeniable sexual tension in close quarters at Christmas.
There have been admittedly been other sexually-driven Christmas movies released to popular acclaim in the past as well – Bad Santa features hot tub sex, while Eyes Wide Shut is deemed a festive film and includes a masked orgy.
So this poses the question: is Christmas actually sexy? It can be romantic, sure – we are dead in the middle of cuffing season after all. Besides, the Christmas romance movie is nothing new: think Love Actually, The Holiday, Holidate, the list goes on. The festive season certainly zones in on love – romantic, platonic, familial – it's a time to show good will to the important people in your life, sometimes to the point of cheesiness. There are so many iconic romantic Christmas moments, including Love Actually's Sam (Thomas Brodie-Sangster) running through the airport to tell his love how he feels, or Amanda (Cameron Diaz) and Graham (Jude Law)'s tearjerking reunion in the snow in The Holiday. But are we increasingly gravitating towards horny vibes during the festive season too?
What with the multiple gluttonous rounds of Christmas dinner and the close face time with family members, this time of year surely doesn't scream sex. But maybe there's something in letting our freak flag fly through watching these festive movies, liberating some spicy, sexual feelings while we cuddle up in our comfies.
Perhaps it just comes down to a new form of wish fulfilment, shifting from rooting for a couple to find love by New Year's Eve When Harry Met Sally style to also indulging in a little on-screen sexy action – whether it's seeing a snowman shapeshift into a topless Adonis or watching a show that Magic Mike himself would be proud of, all in service of celebrating the festive season. Besides, both of these movies in particular hold a wholesome theme at their heart – recapturing intimacy and saving a much-loved local community spot – it just happens that sex is being sold on top this year. And who are we to criticise the embracing of sexuality, whatever time of year it is?
Maybe we're being told that all we want for Christmas this year is to be gifted abs on screen. But for us, a pair of fluffy, cosy slippers would also work just fine to warm us up.
