What celebrities REALLY say about their exes…
Breaking up is hard to do. While some handle the split with dignity, others prefer to hit way, way WAY below the belt. From the classy to the mud-slingers to the downright shocking disses, we bring you our pick of celebrity's post-split slurs.
REX FeaturesJenny Slate & Chris Evans
Dated: 2016 - 2017
Why the split? Chris' fame put pressure on the relationship.
She said: “To be quite honest, I didn’t think I was his type. I’m considered some sort of alternative option, even though I know I’m a majorly vibrant sexual being.”
He said: Nothing, yet.
Friends? Jenny said: “We’re not on bad terms, but we haven’t really seen each other, spoken a lot. I think it’s probably best. I’d love to be his friend one day, but we threw down pretty hard. No regrets, though. Ever.”
Getty ImagesJennifer Lopez & Marc Anthony
Dated: Married 2004 - 2011
Why the split? J Lo says they tried to make it work, but it just wasn't meant to be.
She said: "I hung in there for seven years. I knew very quickly that it wasn't the right thing.”
He said: "I don't talk about it much as a whole; I just think that's private. I really do and I never have and I'm not sure I ever will. I don't think it's for public consumption. It's hard enough as it is."
Friends? J Lo says they've got the friend thing down, but apparently Marc Anthony is still in love with her, and pretty vocal about it too. They co-parent their 9-year-old twins, Max and Emme.
Rex FeaturesGwen Stefani & Gavin Rossdale
Dated: Married 2002 - 2015
Why the split? For almost 20 years, Gavin and Gwen were rock’s golden couple, but after 13 years of marriage and three children, the pair divorced last year. The proceedings cited ‘irreconcilable differences’ but it wasn’t long before rumours of Gavin’s alleged indiscretions with their nanny began circulating. Said nanny, Mindy Mann, has just announced her pregnancy, but not the identity of the father.
She said: “I wish it didn't happen – I wish that all this wasn't happening. But at the same time, I feel like it was part of my life journey.”
He said: Gavin hasn’t spoken of the split, but he did say in a rep-issued statement at the time: “we remain partners in parenthood and are committed to jointly raising our three sons in a happy and healthy environment.”
Friends? Despite painful rumours and allegations in the press, the pair are keeping it friendly for the sake of their three sons.
PA PhotosKanye West & Amber Rose
Dated: 2008 - 2010
Why the split? It’s hard to believe in the world of Kimye, there was ever anyone else in Kanye’s life. Needless to say, this didn’t end well. And since, Amber made no secret of the fact she believed Kanye had cheated on her with Kim.
He said: “I had to take 30 showers before I got with Kim.” Ouch.
She said: Twitter: “are u mad I'm not around to play in ur a**hole anymore? #FingersInTheBootyAssBitch” OUCH! Literally. Her coup de grace... the index finger emoji. Brilliant.
Friends? We’re guessing... no.
Getty ImagesBrad Pitt & Jennifer Aniston
Married: 2000 - 2005
Why the split? The divorce papers cited ‘irreconcilable differences’, and just one month later those pap snaps of Brad, Angelina and little Maddox rocked the world. It would be about ten years before the world recovered.
He said: “I wasn't living an interesting life. I think that my marriage had something to do with it. Trying to pretend the marriage was something that it wasn't.”
She said: “Nobody did anything wrong. But we wish nothing but wonderful things for each other.”
Friends? Jen revealed that the pair “exchange good wishes”, but not regularly.
Getty ImagesRobert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart
Dated: 2008 - 2012
Why the split? Like when Princess Diana died, or JFK if you’re a stateside senior, EVERYONE remembers where they were when Twilight-gate broke. Kristen snapped canoodling with her married director? Bella would never do such a thing. It’s a crazy woman to cheat on R-Patz, and a braver woman to take on a millions Twi-hards.
He said: “When you're young, it feels like the world is ending. This is the first time the world has reacted the same way."
She said: “It was incredibly painful…Ugh, f*cking kill me."
Friends? They don't speak. Both have moved on, and R-Patz is even getting married.
Rex FeaturesSelena Gomez and Justin Bieber
Dated: 2010 - 2014
Why the split? The teen dream duo were on again/off again more times than we’ve had champagne cocktails but finally called in quits in 2014, merely stating they were too young for the intensity of their relationship. Justin rebelled (cue mug shots, tattoos and peroxide) while Selena sexed up her image with a series of sultry photoshoots.
He said: “My full identity was in her. Her identity was in me. When stuff would happen, I would lose my freakin’ mind, and she would lose her mind, and we would fight so hard because we were so invested in each other.”
She said: “I’ll forever support and love him in a way that... we grew up together. I think people want it to be different. We’re too young for that.”
Friends? There may still be feelings there, but with rumours circulating that Biebs is ready to settle down with new girlfriend Hailey Baldwin, how long will things stay civil?
Getty ImagesAlanis Morisette & Ryan Reynolds
Dated: 2002 - 2007
Why the split? After the glossy likes of Scar-Jo and Blake Lively, it’s hard to believe that Ryan Reynolds ever dated anyone outside of Hollywood, but back in 2004, he of heavenly body and angry rock, hair-shaker Alanis were announcing their engagement. Ryan began dating Scarlett Johansson shortly after their split, meanwhile Alanis turned her grief into gold with the breakup-inspired album Flavors Of Entanglement.
She said: “I think the most painful, sort of suffering oriented moments in my life [are] when I’m resisting something… If I just say, ‘It’s true. I’m unbelievably insecure, really broken, devastated,’ then I can move through it, toward the next place. But if I keep resisting it, I’ll stay there forever.”
He said: Ryan hasn’t spoken of their split since, but he did say in a rep-issued statement at the time that they: “remain close friends and continue to have the utmost love and admiration” for each other. Hmmmm.
Friends? The pair, who are both now married with children, don’t appear to have any contact.
Rex FeaturesBen Affleck and Jennifer Garner
Married: 2005 - 2015
Why the split? It was believed to be one of the strongest marriages in Hollywood, but after a seemingly civil split, things are starting to get a little messy, especially as Ben has since hooked up with the nanny of their three children. What a cliché.
She said: “He’s still the only person who really knows the truth about things. And I’m still the only person that knows some of his truths.”
He said: Ben has kept uncharacteristically quiet about the split. But in an interview with the New York Times a day after Jen's Vanity Fair interview, he said: "Jen's great. She's a great person. We're on great terms. I just saw her this morning, so that's the reality that I live in. She felt like she wanted to discuss it and get it out there and get it over with, so she could say, 'Look, I already talked about it — I don't want to do it again.'"
Friends? The pair have put on a united front for the sake of their daughters, and seem to be doing well.
PA PhotosBen Affleck and Jennifer Lopez
Dated: 2002 - 2004
Why the split? The original Bennifer were Hollywood’s circus couple du jour in the early noughties, and in just 18 short months they managed to cram in a movie, a music video and a 6.1 carat pink diamond.
He said: “So gross it's destructive to my career, it’s destructive to my soul, to my everything." Don’t hold back, Ben!
She said: “It felt like my heart had been torn out of my chest.”
Friends? Despite Ben’s verbal bashing, the pair are reportedly friends now and check in with one another from time to time.
Getty ImagesKate Moss & Johnny Depp
Dated: 1994 - 1998
Why the split? Both impossibly beautiful, stylish and rebellious to boot, they were the 'It' couple of the 90s, but constant partying and media scrutiny took its toll on the pair and within weeks Johnny was spotted with Kate-a-like Vanessa Paradis.
He said: “Kate is somebody I care about deeply… she’s a great, lovely, sweet, pure girl – really a great kid, and I care about her. I love her on a very deep, profound level.”
She said: “I really lost that gauge of [having] somebody I could trust. [It was a] nightmare. Years and years of crying. Oh, the tears!”
Friends? Despite having nothing but praise for one another, Kate and Johnny have had little contact since their relationship ended.
paMadonna & Guy Richie
Married: 2000 - 2008
Why the split? While Guy has been more vocal on their “soap opera” marriage, both stars have stated it ended because they couldn’t “bear to live with the pretence any longer”.
He said: “Madonna makes things happen. Put Madonna up against any twenty-three-year-old, she'll outwork them, out-dance them, out-perform them. The woman is broad… But she's retarded, too."
She said: “Because when you start off, everything’s great and lovely, and the person you’ve married is flawless, and you’re flawless. Then time goes by, and you share a life, you have children, and there are cracks in the veneer. It’s not as romantic as it used to be. You think, ‘This isn’t what I thought it was going to be,’ and ‘How much am I willing to sacrifice?’"
Friends? Considering the pair have recently been embroiled in a messy custody battle of son, Rocco, and Madonna has uncharacteristically conceded defeat to her ex, we’re guessing…no.
Instagram/Perrie EdwardsPerrie Edwards & Zayn Malik
Dated: 2012 - 2015
Why the split? They were a match made in pop heaven, but rumours of infidelities and indiscretions rocked the chart-topping couple and, after setting up home together, announcing their engagement (while Directioners worldwide weep into their 1D pillows) and numerous shows of a ‘united front’, Zayn called things off last year. And NOT, he’s keen to vocalise, via text - as had been reported in the press.
He said: “I love her a lot, and I always will, and I would never end our relationship over four years like that.”
She said: “I’m good. And I’m just thanking my lucky stars I have these three girls.”
Friends? The couple have had little contact since their messy split.
Rex FeaturesKaty Perry & Russell Brand
Married: 2010 - 2011
Why the split? The quirky duo’s short-lived union came to an end after just 14 months. The pair cited “irreconcilable differences” in proceedings, but Perry has since stated that conflicting career schedules and her reluctance to have children led to the demise of their marriage.
He said: “I'm associated with the very thing I detest: vapid, vacuous, plastic, constructed, mindless celebrity. That's the very sea we're swimming in, ‘Oh, who's he?’ ... ‘He's married to Katy Perry’.” Yikes.
She said: “[Brand] really wanted me to have children, and I knew I wasn’t ready — I think it was a way of control. I think it was part of, if I have a kid, then I would have to sacrifice — I’d have to be home more…There were two weeks of my life after I found out the truth of my marriage where I was like, ‘OK. All right. I can’t feel this. This is too intense right now.”
Friends? Katy has confessed that the pair haven’t spoken, save a single text from Brand regarding the divorce.
Rex FeaturesTom Cruise & Katie Holmes
Married: 2006 - 2012
Why the split? Depending on which source you believe, Scientology, contrasting views on child-rearing and career-support have all been cited in one of the most high-profile divorces in Hollywood history. And to think it all began with a sofa-bounce and some very public PDAs?
He said: “There is no need to protect my daughter from my religion.”She said: “I don’t regret anything that I’ve done. I’ve learned from everything, and everything sort of leads you to the next place. I just keep going.”
Friends? It has been reported the exes don’t even speak directly to one another regarding daughter, Suri, so they’re probably not exactly ‘chummy’.
PA PhotosCalvin Harris & Rita Ora
Dated: 2013 - 2014
Why the split? In true 21st century celebrity style, the pair’s messy split went viral; played out over Twitter for all to follow, and it wasn’t long before the mud-slinging started. The exes even famously fought for the rights of a song they collaborated on.
She said: “I was at that point in my relationship where I felt he could do no wrong. I thought he had my back and that he'd never steer me wrong. There was a reason why I split up with him.”
He said: “You act so innocent now...but you lied so soon.”
Friends? That’s a firm no, then.
Rex FeaturesJustin Timberlake & Britney Spears
Dated: 1999 - 2003
Why the split? They were the teen pin-up pairing of the ‘90s; but it all went oh-so wrong when rumours emerged that Britney cheated on her N*SYNC fella with his best friend, Wade Robson. Britney and Justin put their pain into pop…
He said: “You don't have to say, what you did, I already know, I found out from him. Now there's just no chance, for you and me, there'll never be. And don't it make you sad about it.” Cry Me A River
She said: “Please forgive me. My weakness caused you pain. And this song's my sorry.” Everytime
Friends? The pair are civil enough in interviews, but they reportedly haven’t spoken since.
Getty ImagesJennifer Lawrence & Nicholas Hoult
Dated: 2010 - 2014
Why the split? We were devastated when news broke that one of our favourite young Hollywood couples had parted ways, but the split couldn’t have been more amicable, and Nicholas was quick to defend J-Law amid the traumatic photo-hack scandal.
He said: “We’re still friends. I’m very proud of her.”
She said: “My life was this person and these movies and we broke up around the same time that I wrapped those movies. Being 24 was this whole year of ‘Who am I without these movies? Who am I without this man?’”
Friends? Happily, yes.
PA PhotosKim Kardashian & Kris Humphries
Married: 2011 - ...72 days later
Why the split? It certainly made for a messy and lengthy divorce, even though the marriage itself lasted a pitiful 2.5 months. Kris and his family have since angrily branded the wedding was a “sham” orchestrated for entertainment purposes only.
He said: “Man, I'm glad I got out when I did.”
She said: “I was in love… I would've had an extravagant wedding anyway, to end that relationship was a risk in itself to lose ratings and I had to take the risk to be honest to myself. I saw how our relationship was. I don't want to get into the small things, but once we moved in, I knew he was not the one.”
Friends? Not even close.
WennAlexa Chung & Alex Turner
Dated: 2007 - 2011
Why the split? They were the Noughties Kate & Johnny; young and gorgeous with a side of oh-so cool that the style columns just ate up. When the Arctic Monkeys’ frontman and the designers’ darling du jour hooked up, we wanted it to be forever.
He said: “I am a romantic fool, no doubt about that.”
She said: “I'm not heartbroken any more, but I definitely was.”
Friends? Alexa has said that she still thinks of Al (as she affectionately calls him) as her best friend. Awww – why can’t you two just work it ouuuuut?
GettyRihanna & Chris Brown
Dated: 2008 - 2013
Why the split? A match made in hip-hop heaven, but Chris’ halo certainly slipped when a shocking leaked police photo confirmed he’d assaulted his pop star girlfriend in 2009. Rihanna forgave her man and the pair reconciled briefly before calling it quits for good in 2013.
He said: “It's always gonna be love. I'm a grown man, just gotta fast forward. I'm always gonna love that person. I can’t be focused on wife-ing someone that young. I need to be the best Chris Brown I can be."
She said: "I don't hate him. I will care about him until the day I die. We're not friends, but it's not like we're enemies. We don't have much of a relationship now."
Friends? Rihanna’s pretty much answered that question for us.
Rex FeaturesChris Martin & Gwyneth Paltrow
Dated: Married 2003 - 2014
Why the split? The pair famously announced their “conscious uncoupling” via a somewhat smug joint statement, and scoff as we may at their choice of wording, you can’t deny these superior ex-spouses have an amicable divorce pegged.
He said: "I suddenly feel very grateful for all these things that are in my life. I just feel happy to be alive and if that's coming across that's because it's real."
She said: “Luckily my ex-husband is an incredibly good ex-husband and an amazing dad."
Friends? Natch! Gwyneth has even since described Chris as like a “brother”. Which is kind of sweet and gross at the same time…
Rex FeaturesTaylor Swift & John Mayer
Dated: 2009 - 2012
Why the split? Taylor is famous for turning her pain into pop, and if revealing track Dear John is anything to go by, it seems to suggest Taylor was the one left heartbroken by ‘player’ Mayer.
She said: “I see it all now that you’re gone, Don’t you think I was too young, To be messed with, The girl in the dress, Cried the whole way home, I should’ve known. Don't you think nineteen's too young to be played by your dark, twisted games, when I loved you so.” Dear John
He said: “I will say as a songwriter that I think it's kind of cheap song writing… I think it's abusing your talent to rub your hands together and go, 'Wait till he gets a load of this!' That's bullsh*t.”
Friends? It’s even been reported that Taylor is no longer friends with Katy Perry due to her relationship with John, so we’re guessing not.
Getty ImagesDrew Barrymore & Christian Bale
Dated: 1988
Why the split? Back when they were just super-cute teens enjoying their first taste of stardom, a 14-year-old Christian Bale took Tinseltown’s resident bad girl Drew Barrymore on a date.
He said: “We went to see some bloody awful horror film, and that was the end of it. She never called again."
She said: “I don't know! He was so nice... I wasn't like super boy crazy. I had a lot of fish to fry, like I had big problems in my world for many years.”
Friends? The pair have since laughed about their doomed date and Drew’s subsequent brush-off. As have we.
Getty ImagesMiranda Kerr & Orlando Bloom
Married: 2010 - 2013
Why the split? The so-beautiful-you-want-to-weep pairing of Orlando and Miranda ended after six years in 2013 with continued “love, support and respect for each other.”
He said: “We're not friends — we're family.”
She said: “Orlando and I are so close. [We] live across the street from each other and it kind of felt better for Flynn that way.”
Friends? Obviously. The pair admirably maintained a friendly stance for the sake of their son.
