Valentine’s Naughty Gift Guide
Forget red roses, chocolates, promises you don't intend to keep… this year, we're thinking outside the box - so to speak - and we've decided THESE are the naughty but oh-so-nice gifts we'd really like Cupid to deliver this St Valentine's. Boys, we don't think you'll object...
The 21st Century Rabbit
Ever since Sex And The City's Charlotte enjoyed an, ahem, ‘love-in’ with her rabbit in series one, women worldwide have succumbed to the magic of this lively little woodland creature. And whilst the old '90s design is looking a little, shall we say, dated – the new LoveHoney version is like a significant piece of modern art. We can feel another Charlotte-style love-in coming on…
Lovehoney Happy Rabbit Natural Rechargeable Rabbit Vibrator; £49.99
The 21st Century Candle
Classically romantic, yes, but candlelight crosses over into ‘naughty’ territory when the wax becomes playful. This massage candle - from úber-chic sex toy giants Lelo - melts into a luxuriously warm oil with the ever-alluring scent of Black Pepper & Pomegranate. Time to turn up the heat, perhaps?
Lelo Flickering Touch Massage Candle Black Pepper & Pomegranate 150g, £19.99
Lelo or Ann Summers
The 21st Century Blindfold
Fifty Shades... may have brought BDSM to the mainstream, but this blindfold screams femininity above all else. The delicate black lace with sexy eyelash edging and super-soft satin sure appeals to our fabulous and frou-frou side.
Ann Summers Lace Mask with Black Satin, £8
The 21st Century Cuffs
You can keep your tacky furs or studded leather restraints – there’s something so deliciously decadent and bijou about these faux pearl cuffs, packaged in a luxurious yet discreet gift box no less.
Bijoux Plaisir Nacre Sensual Faux Pearl Handcuffs, £19.99
21st Century Erotic Fiction
There’s nothing wrong with enjoying a little, ahem, erotica… After all, if it’s okay by Madonna, it’s okay by us. And if you’re a fan of the classics, then you’ll no doubt be tickled pink to hear that you can now enjoy the likes of your favourite literary heroes in flagrante delicto. Bronté’s Wuthering Heights and Austin’s Pride And Prejudiceare among the classics enjoying some especially saucy updates. A peek behind the closed doors of Pemberley’s sexiest master bedroom; a wild fumble in the Moors ‘tween Cathy and Heathcliff and, of course, Mr. Darcy… Enough said.
The Wild and Wanton Editions by Annabella Bloom, £9.99
Coco de Mer
The 21st Century Sex Toy
Part bullet vibrator, part G-spot stimulating love egg; the oh oh OH-inducing genius that is the Lelo Lyla 2 not only looks super-chic and glamorous, but has a remote range of up to 12 metres. Should make that Valentine’s meal, ahem, interesting to say to the least…
Lelo Insignia Lyla 2 Remote Control Vibrating Love Egg, £94.99
Lelo or Ann Summers
The 21st Century Babydoll
Well, not really 21st Century – more Mary Antoinette than avant-garde, but personally, we’d take this kitsch and cutesy babydoll over space-age leather and chains any day; the perfect blend of frou-frou and fabulous for a dangerous liaison this Valentines.
Ann Summers Antoinette Babydoll, £50
The 21st Century Craze
Fifty Shades... fever is sweeping the nation and, evidently, the bedroom – and the new collection of Fifty Shades Sex Toys is guaranteed to be a sell-out this St Valentine’s. Personally, we can’t wait to get our hands on (and in) these Christian Grey cuffs, in shiny silver steel and engraved with the legend: “You. Are. Mine.” Sigh, yes. Yes, we are.
Fifty Shades of Grey You. Are. Mine. Metal Handcuffs, £14.99
The 21st Century Tickler
Shake a tail feather this Valentine’s with this oh-so chic tickler from luxurious erotic boutique Coco de Mer. Ticklers are used for sensory play simply by tracing and teasing across your partner’s body, but this is one bondage accessory – with its decorative antique-style handle and flurry of black and gold feathers – that needn’t remain hidden in the “goody” drawer.
Coco de Mer Small Feather Tickler, £12.50
The 21st Century Love Egg
Kegel exercises just went high-tech, and all the more pleasurable. The use of the love egg as a vaginal work-out dates back to ancient China, when the secret of this practice was taught only to the Queen and concubines in the Royal Palace. If it’s good enough for king and country, eh? Well these darling little love beads assist with strengthening the pelvic floor while offering a continuous challenge and thrill.
Lelo Luna Pleasure Bead System, £28.99
Lelo or Ann Summers
The 21st Century Knickers
Deliciously naughty silk in berry red, with heart-shaped peekaboo panelling to reveal your derriere in all of its pert perfection - could these pants be any cuter? Fun, flirty and fit for a, say, perpetually twitching palm…
Coco de Mer Valentine's Spanking Knickers in Berry, £58
The 21st Century Gift Box
A box of chocolates is always welcome, sure. But a box of bondage? Now that’s progression! Lelo’s Adore Me set includes a rechargeable lipstick-like Mia Vibrator and pure silk/suede restraints – all beautifully packaged in an úber-desirable gift box. We want!
Lelo Adore me Valentine’s Pleasure Set, £89
Lelo or Ann Summers
The 21st Century Bustier
We’re coming over all Moulin Rouge this Valentine’s. Why? Because we Can Can Can! (Sorry). And because we’ve always harboured the ambition to become a Victoria’s Secret Angel – no matter how unlikely that is - we can’t get enough of this beautiful, beguiling and totally-hot bustier. And if it makes us look anything like Miranda Kerr, all the better.
Victoria's Secret very Sexy Lace Merrywidow, £88
