We would like to thank GLAMOUR reader Jo Ardus for sending us in the following poem after reading Dawn O'Porter's May issue column 'I want my vagina to look like a vagina'. It has really, really made our Friday.
I loved Dawn's article 'I want my vagina to look like a vagina' and agree with every word. I wrote this poem some months ago after reading yet another article on how we can improve our 'ladybits'. I hope you like it.
You pluck, you trim, you wax You change your natural state You shave, you cleanse, you tweeze Before you copulate
Lie back for your vajacial To the beautician it's just a chore But you hope your vagina's prettier Than the one she saw before
And as for remodelling This is apparently what goes Symmetry and neatness A vagina like a rose
We can now steam our vaginas For inner harmony Who knew boiling a kettle Would set our fannies free
There is a costly serum To tighten up your fairy But you'd need to take a mortgage out To firm up your inner Mary
Our ladybits aren't pretty But looks aren't everything A vajazzle here, a piercing there Why cover them with bling
Your peepee, snatch, or coochie coo Your flower, nink or muff Whatever name you give her Your vagina's had enough
By Jo Ardus
You can read Dawn's column in the May issue of GLAMOUR.
